Sunday, July 22, 2007

Oh! The Momentum!

I did a monumental thing this morning. With luck, this single change may also change my life.

What is this? I hear you ask. What have you done? Cut your hair? Adopted a handsome, virile 18 year old blond as your son and personal slave?

No, no, none of that (and I prefer brunettes as it happens). This is something important, something really essential to my state of being.

I've moved my laptop back to my office. My scarily tidy, somewhat empty, office is now once more occupied.

Ok, so that seems like a pretty small deal, but you who are mercifully ignorant about how the furniture in my mental attic is arranged don't understand how these little things create big storms. I've been wedded (welded?) to the bedroom. This isn't a good thing, as it is part of the old (tired, worn, threadbare) depression pattern. The TV holds sway, and not just any TV. Only the TV in the Bedroom.

My office is on the other side of the house. There's no TV in there. All I can do in my office is read, play with a cat, listen to the stereo, or sit in a semi-comfortable and much better for my spine office chair and type on the computer. It's not really comfortable for mindless wandering through the interwebinets. The window (where Ben is now parked) peers into the back yard where birds, lizards and the occasional squirrel roam. Its not, strangely enough, as isolated and separate as the bedroom. Mentally, it's just a very different place.

I'm trying for a change of atmosphere, a shift of environment, an attempt to do something other than schlumph around, a worthless schlog of foam on the beach of life. My twisted brain associates a lot with where I am and what is around me. So, being in the office with Ben talking to me about the sudden lack of suitable cat-lounging locations (amended) and the difficulty of draping himself on my desk, I feel different than I do when I'm sitting in the bedroom (even though it has been painted and cleaned into a suitably serene environment). So, I'm out of there and in here. I have a window and music and cats (Pooty just wandered in to pass judgment). It's time to do something. It's time to make changes; write my resume, finish a novel, polish a short story and research a market to submit it to. Anything is possible, once I get moving.

Of course, I could get a little TV to go in here.

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