Me: "My old dog Xany was cute, though."
Him: "Yeah, especially the way he'd hump the grass in the back yard."
Me: "He wasn't humping the grass. He was scratching his belly. It's a dog thing."
Him: "Uh huh."
Me: "I bet you'd do it do if you could."
Him: "You'd be surprised how many different things a guy rubs his dick on when he's younger."
Him: "You know, like , 'that feels different.' Any guy who says otherwise is lying."
Me: (long pause) "You just revealed one of the Dark Secrets of the Brotherhood, didn't you?"
Him: "Nuh uh!"
Me: "They're going to revoke your membership."
Him: "Nope. It's in the rules. You just deny everything."